We just stepped out for a short while...

Here's a little of what we did (from what my tiny mind can recollect).

In Leeds, at the Faversham, we played a good show for the first time. We've not always had much luck there (our fault, not yours). For those of you who made it, sorry it took us so long. We would never have stopped trying. Monkey Swallows the Universe were excellent. I'm sure I heard their guitar player playing Bert Jansch in a little daydream.

In a cave at the back of Manchester's Dry Bar, we turned to liquid. Did anyone see our nipples? We played on a stage made from lots of little stages. Tracyanne dished out dessert and, ever keen to meet the needs of our discerning listeners, we played Books Written for Girls. We don't play that so often.

In Hull Adelphi, there was no toilet paper. Whatsoever. And yet it is known as one of the twenty British venues which make up the Toilet Tour. Great place - the bar is a bus. Go and see for yourself. Paul the owner is quite a character...

In London, at the Cargo, it was hot again. Lots of people came to interview and photograph us. Francois and his band, harpist included, blew the audience away and made us scared to play. Tracy got confused by technology. My trousers bunched up, Larry David style.

In Norwich Arts Centre, we were taken very good care of, once again, in what has to be one of the finest places to play live in any country - and that's swearing. In an attempt to stop melting in the heat I shaved off my beard and what's left of my hair in the basement of a funny little barber shop at the top of the hill, where the man said "Bit rough, that Glasgow, innit?". Or did I just imagine that?

We all got a bit merry that night, and Gavin told us all about the birds and the bees.

In Colchester Arts Centre, another beautiful building, a nice man made a huge pot of delicious chilli, and a very quiet audience gave us a very loud cheer at the end. Francois and his gang drove home to Bristol that night, accidentally via Nottingham.

We drove to Cardiff on the 14th. It was a day off. Nigel went home to consolidate his empire for a night. We ate out in town, and then a quiet night in the hotel. The following night, at Clwb Ifor Bach, Francois had his Big Band on parade, featuring the debut of one Lee Thomson on drums. It was such a relief to see some familiar faces and afterwards to find a bar open till 2am which didn't require an entry fee or a debate with bouncers. When I woke the next morning, there was a huge green band painted across the back of my nice new white shirt. What's that all about?

Before I forget - HEY EVERYBODY! CAREY GOT HER RESULTS BACK! SHE GOT A FIRST!

In Sheffield, at the legendary Leadmill, Lee narrowly avoided being smothered by a falling banner, and one of the "meticulous" security staff didn't allow Gavin onto the stage until he had his little sticker on. Oh, and they wouldn't accept Scottish fivers or tenners at the bar. I lack the skill to convey just how annoying that really is. Still, they were a decent bunch all the same and we had a great time and the crowd were lovely. Sorry to those of you who missed out on t-shirts, there'll be more soon...

We came home on Saturday, just for the day, to play our biggest (best?) Glasgow show to date at the QM Union. We always got the impression that only a handful of people gave a toss about us in Glasgow. Maybe we didn't have enough to offer until now. Who knows? Who cares? It was the greatest.

On Sunday on a very rainy Loch Lomond, hung over, cold and soaking, rowing a small, bashed boat into Balmaha Marina, I smiled to myself and thought, "If only I had a bucket to bail this water out." More on this another time.

We finished up on Monday there in Aberdeen, at the Tunnels. Francois and Victor joined us on their farthest trip north and with Lee on drums again, treated the crowd to the cutest AC/DC cover ever. When it was our turn, we had a few sound problems but, professionals as we are, we rose above them. We did, didn't we? Thanks to Hen for being a decent bloke.

Did anyone else speak to the man at the front who appeared able to communicate only by using Camera Obscura lyrics? Does anyone know if that's a recognised medical condition?

Thank you all. Thank you all so much.

I've just read this back. It's a little dull. But then I'm a little sober; therefore, so am I. A little dull, that is.

See you in a couple of weeks, Americans...

Kenny